Tell-Tales

Warrior of the Light Issue #193

2009-03-05T07:25:00.000+08:00

A reader sends me a questionnaire in which he presents the profile of three world leaders who lived in the same period of history, and asks if it is possible to choose the best one using the following data:

Candidate A was associated with witchdoctors and often consulted astrologists. He had two mistresses. His wife was a Lesbian. He smoked a lot. He drank eight to ten martinis a day.

Candidate B never managed to hold down a job because of his arrogance. He slept the whole morning. He used opium at school, and was always considered a bad student. He drank a glass of brandy every morning.

Candidate C was decorated a hero. A vegetarian, he did not smoke. His discipline was exemplary. He occasionally drank a beer. He stayed with the same woman during his moments of glory and defeat.

And what was the answer?

A] Franklin Delano Roosevelt. B] Winston Churchill. C] Adolf Hitler.

So what then is leadership? The encyclopedia defines it as an individual’s capacity to motivate others to seek the same objective. The bookstores are full of texts on this theme, and the leaders are normally portrayed in brilliant colors, with enviable qualities and supreme ideals. The leader is to society as the “master” is to spirituality. This, however, is not absolutely true (in either case).

Our big problem, especially in a world that is growing more and more fundamentalist, is not allowing people in prominent positions to commit human mistakes. We are always in search of the perfect ruler. We are always looking for a pastor to guide and help us find our way. The truth is that the great revolutions and the progress made by humanity were brought about by people just like us – the only difference being that they had the courage to make a key decision at a crucial moment.

A long time ago, in my unconscious, I changed the word “leader” for the expression “warrior of light”. What is a warrior of light?

Warriors of light keep the spark in their eyes.

They are in the world, are part of other people’s lives, and began their journey without a rucksack and sandals. They are often cowards. They don’t always act right.

Warriors of light suffer over useless things, have some petty attitudes, and at times feel they are incapable of growing. They frequently believe they are unworthy of any blessing or miracle.

Warriors of light are not always sure what they are doing here. Often they stay up all night thinking that their lives have no meaning.

Every warrior of light has felt the fear of joining in battle. Every warrior of light has once lost faith in the future.

Every warrior of light has once trodden a path that was not his. Every warrior of light has once felt that he was not a warrior of light. Every warrior of light has once failed in his spiritual obligations.

That is what makes him a warrior of light; because he has been through all this and has not lost the hope of becoming better than he was.

That is why they are warriors of light. Because they make mistakes. Because they wonder. Because they look for a reason – and they will certainly find one.

Bali Trip

2009-02-28T16:09:00.000+08:00

Poetry time! =D (to keep me sane)

2008-10-27T16:56:00.000+08:00

In Broken Images

~ Robert Graves ~

How to transform a simple scarf into beautiful clothing.

2008-10-16T13:08:00.000+08:00

Tell me how much do you think this top costs? Come on, come on, decide on a number! =)This top is originally a square scarf, you can judge from the light chiffon fabric and the pink floral prints iconic of scarves. My mother and I have transformed this piece of scarf into a flirtatious hanky hem top.

I wish I can say this came from a sudden hit of beautiful inspiration but actually I came up with the idea of this top after looking at runway shows and fashion magazines. What my mum did was she cut a hole in the middle of the cloth as apparent. Remember to measure the circumference of your head before you cut the cloth to ensure that your head can slip through comfortably. If your scarf material is thicker than mine, you can sew in a button at the back of the neckline so that you don't have to cut a wide U-shaped neck like mine. Don't try an off-shoulder style with this because it'll look too flirtatious as the scarf itself is see-through. Remember that being adequately modest is part of being stylish.

Mark out where you want the sleeves to be. Remember to take into consideration the width of your body. Sew vertically downwards from the armpit marking to the end of the cloth. Sew in the lining of the neckline and voila you're done! =D Haha. Wear this with a spaghetti strap underneath or a tank top, whatever that suits. It's best to wear this with plain, dark colours or white colour to bring out the floral prints. But again, it depends on what design your scarf is. Colour doesn't really matter if you cover it under silk scarves, but please wear something inside because the sleeves are wide and if you raise your arms high enough people can actually look in! =(

My mum and I finished this in like half a day, partly due to her expertise. Without her help I'll probably take ages. Retail shops sell such designs for up to $100 when in fact you can make it for yourself with a square scarf and a few stitches through the sewing machine. So why splurge? Haha.

My mum is teaching me how to sew and make clothing and this is my first mini-project with her. She did most of the work like cutting, fitting and stitching. I basically came up with the idea, observed and I ran the cloth through the sewing machine. No large accidents like broken needles or torn cloth, luckily! Haha. My first time sewing with the machine and my stitches are terribly unstable. I laughed over my baby stitches with my mum. It looks like a toddler trying to run on the cloth. Haha. She said it's not bad for my first try, at least I didn't ruin her machine and mentioned it was a challenge to sew a cloth that thin. So yay I'm happy! And I love love love this top. My mom has such a good eye for fabrics! This top is suitable for day and night. I can go to parties or just hang out in this. I swear the fabric floats and it's so graceful, but I don't want to post a photo of myself wearing it. Ok so here's the answer to the above question, it only costs 4 bucks!!!! But it looks like a million dollars! Haha. My mum bought the scarf in Indonesia for Rp 24,000 equivalent of about S$4, and with a few simple stitches, this is what $4 worth looks like! It's a good save-money idea during this financial crisis =D

Not ideal to wear while shopping because I don't want to tug at it or it might tear. Be gentle with fragile clothes. Ah, I believe I did the fabric justice! So I didn't destroy the scarf for nothing =D Scarves are really versatile and this is one way you can transform a scarf. If you have a triangular, fringed shawl/scarf, try wearing it as a wrap skirt over a pair of jeans or on its own if it's really long. With the right colour and design, you might actually look as if you're wearing a cowboy skirt ala Hermes!

2005-04-24T19:17:00.000+08:00

I'm running away,
Feeling like life's prey.
They're all around me,
The predators that are going to devour me.

Those big red eyes,
Those stupid lies.
Those menacing claws,
Are picking on my flaws.

Those monsters,
Life's predators.
I can only run;
Protect myself with a gun.

But they're still hot on my heels,
As if I'm they're only meal.
I'll be made a stew,
What can I do?

2005-03-03T13:27:00.001+08:00

Standing in the rain,
Bathing in pain.
No one notices me—I’m just Plain Jane.

Oh how painful it is to stand in the rain!
I could neither dance nor sing,
I am being chained.

I yearn for someone to set me free,
They glanced at me,
Then turned to flee.

Will anyone ever hear my plea?
Or am I just a silent, lifeless tree?

2005-03-03T13:27:00.000+08:00

I’m
Soaked
In the rain,
Feeling this pain.
As thunders rumble,
And lightning flash. How I
Wish someone would see me,
And kindly offer a warm shelter.
But people past by, without noticing,
That I am there, feeling empty. I stand
Motionless, as raindrops fall, and all I
Feel is just nothing. I ask not for pity,
Just some compassion, to a lonely
Person, that’s me. But nobody
Would ever notice me.
-angesil-

2004-12-15T14:09:00.000+08:00

The feeling of loneliness
Is slowly eating me up.
My world is filled only with darkness,
I guess I might just give up.

What if I fly down,
Down to the ground?

What if I take a knife,
Or maybe dive?

Should I pop pills in?
I guess it's all a sin.

2004-10-21T20:25:00.000+08:00

Words are words,
Without a doubt.
They are not for nerds,
From words ideas sprout.

Words are words,
In their own way.
Words describe birds,
Describe scenic bays.

Yet they are misused,
Misconceptions occur.
Hearts are bruised,
Meanings blurred.

Yet words are always words,
Waiting for someone to bring them to life.
And words are words,
For words I'll strive.

2004-07-19T11:26:00.000+08:00

Rotting

Sigh.
Rotting in a corner.
and yet again,
I sigh?

Sigh.
Nobody knows,
Nobody cares.
What's the point?
Just rot.

Sigh.
World empty,
Life rolling downhill.
Whee,
I'm rotting.

Sigh.
Life sucks,
School sucks,
Everything sucks.
Yea,
I'm rotting.

Sigh.
Maybe life doesn't suck,
Maybe school rocks.
But whatever,
I suck.

2004-07-12T14:29:00.000+08:00

oh well, this blog will bedead for weekdays, only on weekends then i'll try to squeeze a poem out. my greatest apologies. anyway, cya!

2004-07-08T19:54:00.000+08:00

Despair

Despair, despair,
Noone seems to care.

To fate you surrender,
You feel the weight on your shoulders.

You suddenly realise,
That you see no paradise.

All is just a world of darkness,
As you cry in loneliness.

The world seems bleak,
Your legs go weak.

Who will see your plight?
The day is as dark as night.

Wallow in self-pity,
You live in an abandoned city.

2004-06-26T19:08:00.000+08:00

I'll Be There For You
(F.R.I.E.N.D.S theme song)

So no one told you life was gonna be this way [four claps]
Your job's a joke, you're broke, your love life's D.O.A.
It's like you're always stuck in second gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year, but...

CHORUS
I'll be there for you
(When the rain starts to pour)
I'll be there for you
(Like I've been there before)
I'll be there for you
('Cause you're there for me too)

Your still in bed at 10, and work began at 8
Burned you breakfast so far, things are going great
Your mother warned you there'd be days like these
But she didn't tell you when the world was brought down to your knees - and

CHORUS

No-one could ever know me
No-one could ever see me
Since your the only one who knows - what it's like to be me
Someone to face the day with make it through all the rest with
Someone I'll always laugh with
Even in my worst I'm best with you

It's like you're always stuck in 2nd gear
When it hasn't been your day, your week, your month or even your year
CHORUS

2004-06-25T22:49:00.000+08:00

Thank You

Thank you my friend,
For making me stronger.
Thank you my friend,
For making me sad no longer.

Thank you my friend,
For making me learn to love.
Thank you my friend,
You must have been sent from up above.

Thank you my friend,
For seeing me through.
Thank you my friend,
For I know you are true.

Thank you my friend,
May our friendship stand.
Thank you my friend,
May we be forever friends.

2004-06-25T22:40:00.000+08:00

A New Beginning

All good things must come to an end,
But an end marks a new beginning.
Another semester with friends.

Ending holidays isn't that bad,
In fact we should be glad!
For another time has come,
It's time for us to have some fun!

A new semester,
A new beginning.
A new beginning,
A new experience.

Aprreciate every single day of life,
Because it's every single day we strive!

2004-06-23T16:43:00.000+08:00

The Little Leaf

A little leaf asked the other little leaves,
Why are we green?
The little leaves replied,
Because we are different.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
How are we different?
The little leaves replied,
We bring peace and serenity,
Like none others can bring.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
Who is the wind?
Why is she blowing?
The little leaves replied,
She's our Lady,
She blows us motherly kisses.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
Why do butterflies like flowers?
The little leaves replied,
Because both are beautiful.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
Aren't we beautiful too,
Why don't they like us?
The little leaves replied,
The love us,
For we made them who they are today.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
Why do we grow from the tree?
The little leaves replied,
Because the tree is our mother.

The little leaf asked the other little leaves,
When can we grow up and leave?
The little leaves replied,
When we turn yellow and die.

2004-06-23T16:39:00.000+08:00

The Wind Sweeps By...

The wind sweeps by,
Down, down,
The leaves fly.

The wind sweeps by,
Rustle, rustle,
The treetops sigh.

The wind sweeps by,
Chirp, chirp,
The birds cry.

The wind sweeps by,
The leaves wave,
Saying good-bye...

2004-06-22T22:52:00.000+08:00

The World Beyond

Locked up in a cold cage,
Hung at a window,
I see the world beyond...

Morning...
Awaken by the gay chirps of wild birds,
Cocking their heads up,
Emptying the air in their lungs.

I perch on the little wood,
Watching the world beyond...

Afternoon...
Ladies with rainbow wings,
Flutter before me,
Carrying little baskets at their feet.
Fluttering from flower to flower,
As their baskets are filled,
Their faces speak of joy.

I peck at the little seeds,
Watching the world beyond...

Evening...
Flocks of wild birds fly overhead,
Landing on treetops,
Settling on rooftops.
They chirped with glee,
Of a day they spent free.

I lie on the cold cold cage,
Closing my eyes to the world beyond...

2004-06-22T22:09:00.000+08:00

The Little Girl in Yellow

The day announced a joyous arrival,
The sun glowed brilliantly,
As the wind whistled with glee.

The little girl decided,
To step out of her little home.
Into the light she went,
Leaving the night behind.

The little girl walked past the open fields,
As she breathed in the crisp, fresh air.

A little voice rang through the true blue sky,
A little girl in yellow,
Ran across the fields,
Holding a sunflower in her hands.

The little girl stopped in her steps.
The little girl in yellow,
Smiled a smile of the sun,
And handed the little girl the flower.
With a little wave,
The little girl in yellow ran once more,
Across the fields.

The little girl
Held the sunflower in her hand...

The day announced a joyous arrival,
The sun glowed brilliantly,
As the wind whistled with glee...

2004-06-22T21:58:00.000+08:00

The Little Girl

The night speaks silence,
The moon gazes with pity.
The stars peer with tears,
At a little girl in her little home.

The only light shone from the little home.
In the little home,
The little girl wrote,
She sighed.

Home,
But alone.
The little girl wrote.
She heaved.

The little girl closed the book,
Gazing at the nightsky above...

The night speaks silence,
The moon gazes with pity.
The stars peer with tears,
At a little girl in her little home...

2004-06-22T02:07:00.000+08:00

Lost

Feel so lost,
So lonely.
A frost,
Coming to take over me,
Sadly.

Where am I?
Where am I headed to?
Want to cry,
Where are you?

Feeling about,
In the darkness.
Want to shout!
But all I can feel is loneliness...

The chill wind sweeps by...
Give me wings,
Make me fly.

Want to be free,
But here I am,
Hugging my knees...

Feel so lost,
Like a piece of waste,
Tossed...

2004-06-21T22:11:00.000+08:00

Moonlight

Moonlight night,
Moonlit night.
Stars shine,
Wind sighs.
Clouds...
roll by...

2004-06-19T22:18:00.000+08:00

Dreams

Dreams to dream,
Dreams to realise.

Sacrifice to dream,
Leave to dream.
Cry to achieve,
Hurt to go for.

Then left.
Many behind.
Many who cried,
Many who agonised.
Many who missed you,
Many who loved you.
Many who adored you,
Many who depended on you...

You can don't leave,
But you have your dreams.
So you dreamt,
And you left.

But your soul remained,
A soul that lived in ~Dreams~.
A dance,
The last dance,
So dream...

Best wishes,
Always...

2004-06-19T12:52:00.000+08:00

Troubled

Sigh...
I don't know why,
I feel so troubled.

Maybe I do know why,
But I thought I could just pass it by.
Feel so troubled.

Many things
To think
About,
A mind filled with doubts.
I feel so troubled.

Friendship,
Kinship,
Relationships,
Hardship.

I don't know,
But I feel troubled...

2004-06-04T22:42:00.000+08:00

Death

I used to feel,
Death is not only to kill,
But also a way,
To get away.

Death to me,
Used to be,
The path to be free.

Now I understand otherwise,
That suicide is but cowardice.

That death does not work,
It's courage you have to fork.

Courage to live,
Courage to give.
Courage to hope,
Courage not to mope.

May we live each day,
With a heart gay.
May we see the light,
With each of our plight.

2004-05-27T22:24:00.000+08:00

Hurt

I'm sorry, my friend.
I have hurt you time and again.
You are a gem,
Yet I do not appreciate,
Again.

I apologised,
Yes I did,
But I have not changed
My attitude towards you.
I'm sorry my friend,
I did not mean to.

I hope to change,
Please give me a chance,
I really will.

But tell me too,
My friend,
What you truly feel.

Please forgive
My folly.
I have not seen
Your hurt,
Till I've read
Your upset heart.

That you have given up hope,
In both of us.
If you do read this,
May you forgive me.

I'm sorry.

2004-05-26T01:19:00.000+08:00

Night?

The night falls softly upon me,
Descending silently,
Swirling, stirring, enveloping around me.

The stars and the moon,
Rises ahead,
Shining, lighting, brightening smiles.

The clouds swirl in the distance,
Rolling, coming, threatening,
Flash!

The lightning flashes in the dark horizon,
Devil's laughter, angel's agony,
Boom!

Pit...
Pat...

2004-05-24T16:53:00.000+08:00

Home
It was a rainy night. The wind was howling and the saplings at both sides of the road swung to and fro precariously. A thick fog surrounded me. Although the street lights were lit, it was so dark I could not see beyond my nose. I could only make use of my knowledge of the neighbourhood to return home. I was adopted by my foster parents a month ago and moved to their house. As I followed the path, I kept going straight and could not find the turn which was supposed to be there. I was terror-stricken momentarily, but regained my composure quickly.

Almost certain that I went the wrong way, I turned around to return to school. Surely, I would find my way back from there. Hugging my jacket tightly for warmth, I followed the path back to school. The fog lifted a little and I could make out rows of identical houses before me. It turned out that it was the right path after all! There was Mr. Burch’s house, the strange new neighbour. Followed by Mrs. Singh’s luxurious mansion. However, the neighbourhood was unusually still. Not a soul was in sight. The houses looked abandoned, as if there was no residents in the neighbourhoods. I gave a casual shrug and turned back to find my way home.

To my surprise, I found myself standing in front of an ancient gate with ivy creeping all over it. I took a step forward and the gate opened by itself, although there was no sensors around. Curious, I went through the open gate and into the oldest building I have ever seen in my life. It was a gigantic and thick, dense vegetation surrounded the mansion and the uneven brick pathway. I maneouvred my way through the uneven path to the porch which was as big as my foster parent’s master bedroom. Before I could knock at the door, the hinges creaked noisily and the great door parted. When I entered the door, my life was changed forever…

The door opened to a grand hall, decorated with opulence. The hall had a mirror with intricately-carved gold frame at a part of a wall. A fire was burning brightly in a gorgeous fireplace beneath the mirror. Antiques stood proudly on the mantelpiece. Chandelier lamps hung from the ceiling and a grand stairway wound itself up the building. There was another door leading to another room. The door split apart as I approached. A huge dining table greeted me. It was laid out with the most delicious and splendid food I had ever seen in my life. If only my foster parents would give me such food. The mixed aromas tickled my nose as I breathed them in deeply, feeling as I was in heaven, without the tasteless, thin gruel I usually forced down my throat. The elegant dining room were decorated with beautiful scenery paintings hanging on the wall and expensive, heavy drapery hung at the windows.

At the end of the table, a lady was sitting on a padded chair, looking stunning in her lavender gown. Her long, golden ringlets draped neatly on her fair shoulders. She left her seat upon hearing my arrival and came towards me. Her movements were done with grace. She was as graceful as a swan, so beautiful that she reminded me of an elegant beauty queen. Her features were so perfect that even medieval queens would be green with envy upon seeing the lady. I stared at her so hard, I could feel my eyes popping out. As the lady approached me, my heart raced. Never had I came across someone who smiled at me truly. The people I met either hated me at first sight due to my shameful dressing or put on a plastic smile. She halted in front of me and stroked my wet hair with loving hands, taking away leaves from the tangled curls. I backed away, suddenly unable to accept her gentleness after living in the cruel world for so many years.

My life had been painful, I was hurt so deeply that I thought I could never heal. Everyone treated me cruelly, even my birth parents abandoned me in a rubbish dump. To my misfortune, I survived and was put into foster homes consecutively. The first pair of foster parents fought ceaselessly and I was put into another family. The next was no better, neither were those that followed. The present foster family I was in was my tenth home. There was no way I could remain for another month. They treated me as a family slave. I had no bed and had to sleep on the floor. The only blanket I could use was the ceiling. What little things I possessed were given by the social workers. School was terrible, my grades were the lowest anyone could get. The principals thought they could change me by sending me for counselling sessions. That did nothing to help, the counsellors were just some dumb people asking a bunch of stupid questions. I was nicknamed ‘Hopeless’. That was just me, hopeless.

“Sorry, I have come to the wrong place. I’ll leave now,” I mumbled and turned to leave.

“No, you have not. Only you can see this house. Therefore, you are chosen to come. I have waited for you for a long time,” the lady said in her golden voice.

The lady took my hand and led me to the end of the dining table. She pulled out a seat for me. Her tenderness changed my mind and I sat down on the elegant chair. As I was helping myself to the food in front of me greedily, the lady sat beside me and did not touch the food at all. Instead, she observed me eating with her motherly eyes. I felt uncomfortable at that and stopped, looking up at her. She nodded her head slightly and beckoned me to continue eating. The lady left her seat and went out of the room while I continued feasting.

Just as I chomped down my last mouthful, the lady returned and took me out of the dining room. I was reluctant to go but relented. We walked into the grand hall and up the spiral staircase which had golden railings. The steps were made of marble and felt cool under my bare feet. The lady and I went through a wide corridors with beautiful paintings hanging at the walls and sculptures standing at the side. There were countless wooden doors. We came to the end of a long corridor and yet another door. The lady opened the door for me and went in, asking me to follow her into the room. I went in reluctantly.

Standing at the far side of the room was a fancy canopy king-sized bed. A navy blue blanket was folded in a rectangle on the bed. Fluffy pillows were neatly laid out at the head of the bed. The room and drapes were sea blue, my favourite colour. There was a whole display case of porcelain figurines and dolls. A wooden cupboard at the side had two shelves full of the latest storybooks. Another cupboard was opened and it was full of beautiful clothes I always yearned to have! I stared at the lady in disbelief. However, it suddenly came to my mind that the lady might be showing off her room and the room was not for me after all.

“Nice room you have here. Why are you showing this to me? Trying to impress? No chance,” I said bitterly.

“These are all for you. Do stay with me. You’ll be happy here. A princess you will be with us,” the lady replied with a smile.

“Us?” I thought.

As if the lady could read my mind, she bade me to follow her. We went out into the backyard where children were playing joyfully. The lady introduced me to them and the children pulled me into the crowd. I felt great with them, my heart bursting with joy as I played along with them. They persuaded me to stay, and I did.

I came to know that the lady’s name was Aurora. She was the foster mother of the children who used to be like me. They were all ‘hopeless cases’ before. However, Aurora took them under her wings and cared for them. I was one of them too. Aurora became my permanent foster mother and the children were my siblings. After me, there was other ‘hopeless cases’ too. Most of them did join us, while others simply refused. However, I did live happily ever after with them like the endings of most fairy tales.

2004-05-11T22:01:00.000+08:00

Ghost Hunting “ Shh… keep quiet. She may be here anytime,” Becca instructed.

Our feet made shuffling noises as we crept across the huge hall. Abandoned cobwebs blanketed everything. The floorboards creaked noisily as we tiptoed, it was no use to keep quiet. The ghost would hear us anyway, if there was a ghost in the first place. I sighed. This was a ‘great’ idea indeed. Hearing my heavy sigh, everyone turned to give me a reproaching glare. Rolling my eyes at them, I continued ahead into a wide corridor. The rest followed grudgingly.

The corridor was wide enough for the five of us to walk abreast down it. There were a great many portraits of lavishly-dressed men and women. I noticed that most women wore opulent jewellery and the men fine suits. Their lips were drawn a stern, straight line. Thinking that they were a bunch of boorish old folks with not a single smile, I continued to follow the cautious group ahead. We passed uncountable wooden doors were carved into the walls of the corridor. Although cobwebs covered the door frames, gold showed through the gaps of the webs.

“Here. It must be here, the piano room,” Helen, who was behind Becca, our leader, whispered.

“Please, there is no such thing as ghosts! Ghost-hunting, indeed,” I snorted as five pairs of icy eyes glared at me.

“Fine, fine. Enter then if you dare,” I challenged.

The piano room, was spacious, although the hall that greeted us when we stopped in earlier on were much bigger. The windows had big, heavy red drapes. The drapes were pulled apart and moonlight streamed into the room. Surprisingly, the room was sparkling clean, with not a speck of dust lying around. A grand piano stood proudly in the middle of the room. It was black and well-polished. The cover of the piano was open and there was a score lying on the gleaming piano.

Bella, Becca’s twin stepped out from our midst. She was a talented pianist, winning almost all of the competitions she had participated in. Her eyes were fixed to the score, as if hypnotised by the sight. Bella picked the score up and sat down on the inviting piano seat. She placed the score in front of her silently. We could hear a pin drop at the time. The four of us, Becca, Helen, Sidney and I could only stare at Bella silently as her fingers leapt around the keys of the bewitched piano intensively. She seemed to be fully engrossed in it and there was a special aura around her as she played. The piece she played spoke of hatred, deep revenge , bloody wars and evilness. As Bella played, her hands started to bleed, staining the pure, white keys. She was oblivious to what was going on and continued playing. We stood there, rooted to the floor with our mouths wide open. Just then, Becca ran to her beloved twin sister and tried with all her might to yank Bella away from the piano. However, after a few pulls, Becca looked exhausted. Bella continued to play the piano, unperturbed by her sister’s attempts. Her eyes were bloodshot and started to roll backwards. Suddenly, she collapsed to the floor and heaved her last breath.

I was terribly scared and had no choice but to believe in the presence of the unknown spirits. The tree of us tried to run out of the house, but the door slammed shut at our faces. We heard the lock turn, our hearts throbbing in our mouths. The creaky windows swung open and a strong gust of chilly wind blew against us. Bella’s playing was getting intense. It was as if the ghost had possessed her. Her blood-stained hands continued to bleed fiercely, even her nose and eyes started to bleed as well.

Helen leaned against the wall and slid down, her body as if battered by the wind blowing at us. She hugged her knees for warmth and howled. Her crying was full of sorrow and regret. As she cried, thick, red liquid oozed out from her eyes. Sidney was next, being as light as a feather, the wind blew her body against the wall as she screamed in fight. A loud thud rang in my ears as her body was slammed onto the wall. Four knives flew in from the windows and pinned Sidney to the wall.

I was alone. The next one would be me, I thought gravely. No! This could not be happening to us! NEVER!!! A whirl of thoughts and memories reeled before my eyes. I was feeling dizzy, my breathing was getting difficult. It was as if I could die anytime from then. There was a lady wearing a red gown coming at me. I heard my breath stop, and everything went black.

A beam of strong light awakened me, I was ready to stare at the gates of heaven. I blinked my eyes and shook my head a little to wake myself up to get ready for the next event. I surveyed the room in search of The Gate. However, I was still in the piano room! Bella’s head lay wearily on the white piano keys. Becca lay at her feet. Helen and Sidney were curled up together at a corner of the room. I got back to my feet and searched for each of their pulse. Luckily, they were only sleeping. I heaved a sigh of relief. It was as if nothing had happened last night, as if we had fallen asleep in the room. Although a little afraid of what would happen next, I woke them all up. They were shocked to find themselves sleeping in the room. However, we kept silent and dashed out of the haunted house.

Shockingly, as we ran out of the house, it started to disappear. First, the piano room, followed by the corridors, the hall. Lastly, the whole house vanished into thin air as we stepped out into the open. We did not utter a word and returned to our respective homes with a heavy heart and a host of unclaimed doubts. The incident was never brought up again although it was deeply etched in our minds.

We grew up and went our separate ways. Bella became a well-known pianist, however, she refused to play any music pieces that were fierce and loud. Her twin, Becca, gave up her dream of researching on supernatural beings and became an explorer instead, never visiting any ‘haunted’ places. Helen was a proud mother of three in our hometown. Sidney became an accomplished doctor and I worked as a marine biologist.

One summer, the five of us decided to have a gathering in our hometown. We were welcomed warmly by the townsfolk. Helen and our parents hugged us, crying and laughing at the same time. The evening we arrived, the of us strolled around the town, recollecting pleasant childhood memories with nostalgia as we passed each place and street. Our heart skipped a beat as we saw, on the hill, the haunted house which vanished many years ago after our ghost-hunting trip. We looked at each other in bewilderment. Just then, a group of five children walked past. They were talking excitedly of their thrilling plan to go ghost-hunting in the house that night…

2004-05-02T20:28:00.000+08:00

Wrecked

Streams of tears rolled down the corners of my eyes and onto the semi-dry pillow. That horrible sight of blood stains, police cars, ambulance and a piece of white cloth, with a wrecked BMW, rammed into a tree haunted me. My parents went all quiet at the scene, my little sister sobbed as I hugged her close to me, tightly. Some officers came to us for statements. Dad gave his statements, his arms around my mother as she leaned onto Dad’s broad shoulders for comfort. They tried to ask Connie and I for statements, but I just stared past them, into the vast darkness of trees behind, not uttering a single word. Connie refused to say anything but just sobbed and clung onto me tightly. The officers soon gave up and left us alone. I just stood there, my eyes darting about the scene, examining every single detail. Suddenly, not knowing why, I bolted, leaving my sister screaming after me.

I dashed round the corner, specks of houses and trees racing across the corners of my eyes. Feeling the rush of wind on my face and messing up my hair, I momentarily forgot all about the fatal accident of my elder brother. I came to the park where fond memories of my beautiful childhood with my parents and elder brother were folded up and neatly arranged, as if tucked into a nice drawer. Now, everything was ruined, those memories were strewn about all over the place, swept up and blown away by the wind. What was the use of keeping them when the family picture of bliss was now incomplete? I grabbed a handful of small stones and whirled them one by one into the heart of the pond with all my might, venting my anger and bitterness on them. The ripples on the surface analogised the swirling confusion in my heart. Turning away, I slid my hands into my pockets and trudged home.

I came upon an open field and for no apparent reason, I walked to the heart of the field and lay down on the soft cool grass. Turning to the moon, I felt it cast its light on me, like a mother’s warm smile upon her child’s face. As I basked in the moonlight, I shifted my gaze to the star’s overhead. In the midst of darkness, their twinkle of light seemed to shine a little part of the sky. I thought of the stars, trying to light up the night, but no matter how they tried and hope, they could only light a little part of the dark, night sky…

Tossing around to face the window on my bed, I looked up to the stars above. They appears weak now, as if tired from trying time and again to light up the world. They resembled me too, trying to keep the house bright and cheerful. However, my family were like the night sky, refusing to let my light pass as my parents quarreled endlessly, my brother frequenting the pubs. Connie too was always sticking to me. I sighed and buried my face in the wet pillow…

After a long time gazing at the sky, I got up and left the field, feeling more peaceful than before. The surroundings gradually became more familiar as I neared home. I dragged my weary body and heart home. As I came to the gate of my neighbour’s house, the door of my house opened and a figure rushed out, swearing at someone and slamming the door after him. It was my father. My parents were quarrelling, yet again. He got into his car and drove off. He did not even see me. Before the automatic gate could close, I slipped in and took the pebbled path to the back door. As I reached the wooden door, I hesitated, fearing being reprimanded by my mother of being selfish. However, I opened the door slightly and went into the house. In the living room, Mom was sitting on the sofa, her face buried in her hands as tears trickled down through the gaps of her fingers. I felt the tug in my heart to comfort her, but knew I could not take the risk…

Why did parents get married, have children, quarrel over trivial matters, and finally, divorce? Could they not spare us children the pain and sorrow of having a broken family? I pulled my blanket over my head, drowning my brain with questions none could answer. If parents knew what would happen, would they get together? Sometimes, I wondered if parents cared for our feelings when they fought. Frustrated, I kicked away my blanket and turned to gaze at the ceiling…

Before I could even put my foot on a step, Mom’s voice held me back, “ Would you come over, darling?”

Uh-oh, Mom was sure to kill me. I sat next to her. Suddenly, she hugged me ever so tightly and cried her hearts out. She told me of her worries, concerns, everything. It never came to my mind that I would be my mother’s confidante. What happened to the housewives who talked over the fence with Mom? Me??? Although I was confused at what was going on, I lent my sorrowful mother a shoulder as I hugged her and cried, too. We mourned together for the loss of Michael, Dad’s absence and loss of other close relatives. Finally, Mom looked up at the clock.

“ Look at the time! Go to bed at once, Len!” my mum said chokingly as she regained her composure.

Rushing to the bathroom, I washed up and dressed before going to bed, Connie was still awake, although she pretended to sleep. I gave her usual dose of goodnight kiss and clambered to bed, completely worn out by the whirl of events thus far…

Plucking away my gaze from the ceiling , I picked up my blanket and lay back on my bed. The sound of sniffles of my sister filled the still room. I heaved a soft sigh and sat on Connie’s bed. She looked up at me, her eyes filled with tears. Connie looked at me with her sweet, fair face. She flung her arms around me and started howling. Evidently, Mom heard her and came up. The door cracked open and Mom slipped in. Connie did not stop crying despite Mom’s presence in the room. When Mom saw Connie, her eyes too started to well up. She hugged us and surprisingly, smiled. I gaped at her, then saw through her eyes that she was as deeply hurt as us.

I thought a family was warm, wonderful and a safe refuge from any harm. Whoever said that a family was not painful was lying.